Don’t blink

I was so proud of myself for reading Albert Einsteins theory of relativity and actualy understanding it. But, like Roy Scheiders line in Jaws the 1975 movie “We’re gonna need a bigger boat”, it has a bigger and deeper meaning that spans more than you might think.

Everything can be ‘related’. Think about it. 6 degrees of seperation was a theory that, for fun, showed you were only 6 degrees seperated from anyone else in the world. While thinking about it, I was only 1 degree seperated from Ronald Reagan and Jack Lemon. I actually met and ‘paled around with Bob Hope who knew Ronald Reagan and since I met Lucy Ball, I was only 1 degree of seperation from Vivian Vance. Come to think of it, anyone that worked with or met Bob Hope or Lucy Ball, I am only 1 degree of seperation or ‘relative’ to those people. George Burns and I are seperated by 1 degree…1 person. And if so, how many degrees of seperation am I from Errol Flynn?

But relativity explains even more. Think about how long you had to wait for Christmas when you were a kid. At 6 years old, you probably don’t remember your first 3 or 4 Christmas’. So you remember only maybe 2 which means time stretches and seems long because it you have only experienced something only twice in your lifetime. But when you are 15, you have experienced Christmas 15 times (but only remember 11) so time doesn’t stretch as much as it seemed to when you were 6. By the time you are 60 years old, Christmas seems to come way too fast.

Think of the common housefly. It lives like only a few days. If it were born at 12:01 AM Christmas morning, it will not see New Years day and probably live half of its life during Christmas. Speaking of the fly, I got into my car only to find one buzzing around in my cab. Imagine me trying to swat it or shew it away toward on open window to get rid of it. Now imagine that fly buzzing around in the compartment of my car that was going 75 mph. Was it flying 75mph? No because its speed was relative to the cars interior, not the exterior. Imagine the shock of buzzing around in my car and suddenlyflying out the window and being swatted by a 75 mph wind. Relativity explains that as well. Its speed inside the car vs the speed outside of the car. And to its point of view as it leaves the window and you travel forward at 75 mph and it practically sees you disappear very fast.

Einsteins theory postulates that an astronaut gets in a space ship and leaves the earth and travels near the speed of light for a year into space, turns around and comes back to earth. His twin brother will have aged much more then he did, close to 14 to 15 years more. The astronaut went into space for two years, but time then moves at different rates for each of them.

By the time you are 60 years old, you start to realize that it is no longer time to ‘collect’ but time to reflect. You realize that your past is much longer than your future. You have, at average, lived 2/3 of your life. Your memories are more precious than possesions. Relativity plays a roll in your life again. Your ability to hop, skip and jump are relatively impossible now compared to when you were younger. What happened is you did not listen to your elders that said to slow down and enjoy life. Like the Romans engraved on their sundials ‘enjoy life because it is later than you think’. To the 2 or 3 people that will read this, look back on your life and realize that until you are planted 6 feet under the grass, enjoy life. Enjoy those that are around you. Don’t hold onto those petty grudges of the past, they will burden your spirit. Find the joy you once had as a kid experiencing the rain hit your face for the first time. The simple joys in life will make your life seem relatively longer.

What do I truly believe

Have you ever looked into yourself? Have you ever been introspective and striped away all of the facade, set aside your many masks and looked at who you are, at the core? Not the bumper sticker slogans that everyone else uses, or what you think others want to see in you, but a real virtual naked look at who you really are?

When you are young, you have many chances to ‘reinvent’ yourself. I did it several times. Graduating from elementary school to Jr. High School (when I was a kid, 6th grade was elementary and 7th grade was first year of Jr. High, not “middle school” followed by 10th grade was your first year High School) Each time I had a major change was an opportunity for me to reinvent myself. Then college came and I attended two different colleges so that allowed me to reinvent myself yet again, each time reflecting on who I was and who I wanted to be. You might not realize when you reinvent yourself, but it is human nature. You might not know that your body actually replentishes itself every seven years, so even your body reinvents itself. But who are you at the core?

I grew up in a christian household and went to Sunday school and church. I heard all the sermons, heard all of the Sunday school lessons. I even feel that I was marked at an early age (long story for another post). At the beginning of third grade, my parents took me out of public school and put me in private christian elementary school. There, I heard more christian principles that laid a foundation in my life. But I was also exposed to pornography at an early age. My cousin stole some of his fathers Playboy magazines and we snuck of to my cousins fort and gawked at the pictures and read the articles. I always new there was a difference between boys and girls, but I figured out fast what happened to girls when they grew up. Viva la difference. My cousin and his family I don’t think believed in God, but I hope I am wrong.

It wasn’t until I was married with kids that my wife and I decided to actively find our own church to attend as a family. Once there, my wife and I became involved in many aspects of the church including teaching Sunday school so we could have a little more influence on our kids.

Have you ever seen a nice leather chair? You don’t have to sit in it to imagine just how comfortable it must be. One that looks like it belongs in a mens club with buttery soft leather cushions that you just sink into in all the right places. You can sound like a salesman describing it. You might stand and even convince others how great it is. But have you actually sat in the chair? Have you experienced the comfort of that leather chair? So it is with Christ. Are you truly a deciple of Christ, or have you just read enough about him to convince yourself you are a Christian? Can you speak about him convincingly but not believe in your heart? Are you, as an aquantance once said, a good Catholic because I go to church on Christmas, Easter and I go to confession once or twice a year. I even put a dollar in the plate sometimes. Do you follow a church doctrine or do you have a relationship with Jesus of Nazereth? Have you had an actual personal experience wth Jesus?

I have had many unexplainable instances in my like that, in my mind, are examples of God protecting me or interfering in a positive way in my life. While driving my dads truck in a rain storm, I had to slam on the brakes when the guy infront of me stopped at a yellow light. I hydroplaned and went into a spinning skid. I knew I was going to hit that car, but instead I made a complete 360 degree spin and came to a perfect stop in the lane to the right of the car. While in church one Sunday, I was waiting for a payday but had to have .50 cents for the parking meter for Monday for my job. But I felt the need to give what I had in the offering plate as it was being passed. All I had was change, two quarters a dime and two pennies. The noise as the change was dropped was loud enough to annoy my wife. Later, as we got home from church, I reached into my pocket to get the house keys and to my supprise, I also pulled out two quarters a dime and two pennies. Now I took all the change from my pocket to put in the offering plate, only a key ring with 3 keys on it was in my pants pocket.

I have read “Experiencing God” the book, Taken F.A.I.T.H. training and, with my wife, went on three short term missions trips. Two to Myanmar (formerly Burma) and one to Puerta de mango in Nayarit Mexico. (Doorway to the mangos) On our first trip, in Mandalay Myanmar, while sharing the gospel to a group of people in a gentlemans home, my wife and I noticed an elderly woman with skin like leather. Her whole continance was dark and she acted like she had been beaten by life her whole life. After sharing the gospel, she expressed an interest in accepting Jesus as her saviour. After leading her through the sinners prayer, I saw the Holy Spirit. Her whole face glowed as if it were radioactive. She smiled and said to the translator “I now know I have hope and will live a life in heaven after death.” When Jesus said the Holy Spirit will enter you like a flame. I saw the effect of the Holy Spirit. I saw her face glow bright. It was that moment I knew … before I believed in my heart, but it was that moment that I was granted the honor of physically experiencing…GOD.

On our third trip on missions, we went to a small village in Nayarit Mexico where we helped build an addition to the church during the day and shared the gospel in the evenings. We were given use of a house next to the church to sleep in. The church had cots made for us and one early evening, I was tired from digging the trench for the footings for the additional building. I went to take a nap and after I closed my eyes, I felt the hot breath of something hovering over me. I felt, what ever it was, that it hated me. It’s a feeling you get in the pit of your stomach. Something evil was staring at me and it was close enough that I could feel its hatred. I was too scared to open my eyes to see what it was, but I yelled out for Jesus to save me and cast whatever was near me away. I then had a wave of peace flow thru me and I felt safe enough to open my eyes. There was no one else in the house. To this day, I know it was an evil spirit sent to scare me/torment me. Our group must have been effective against the evil one.

So, lately I have been introspective. Asking God to send the Holy Spirit to guide me which is why I decided to strip away the masks and look at myself at the core. What do I really believe?

While I question myself, I can’t forget that lady in Burma. She radiated hope. I can’t deny what I feel and know deep in my heart that the Bible is true (we can debate later which translation of the bible someone should use) But why have I been so cold lately, spiritually?

I remember a story…The pastor of a church went to visit a member who had not been coming to church lately. It was raining but the door was unlocked and the man told the pastor to come in. So the pastor walked in, took off his coat, hung it up and sat in the chair next to the man who was sitting by the fire. Several quiet minutes passed, when the pastor noticed a piece of coal fall away from the fire and start to loose its glow of fire. The pastor grabbed the fireplace tonges and picked up the piece of coal and put it back into the fire where it burst with heat and the bright glow of the other pieces of coal in the fire. The man then looked at the pastor and said “ OK pastor, I will be back in church Sunday”. The moral is the man had fallen from the fire of the church body and was not glowing with the power of God as he once had been.

That is me. I must find a church body to renew my burning for the Lord. You need to be with like minded people to help sustain your spirit along with prayerfully reading the bible.

So yes, I belive the Bible is real. I believe in God the father, God the son and God the Holy Spirit. I belive Christ, as both man and God, died on the cross for me and rose up on the third day. I believe I saw the Holy Spirit in the lady in Myanmar (Burma) and I believe I was spiritually attacked in Nayarit Mexico. And while I acknowledge I am basically a good man, I am far from perfect, flawed in need of the silversmith to burn away all of my impurities to reveal the true me, not because I deserve it, but because God already paid the price for my sins.

Now, it is your turn. Be brutally honest and look at yourself. What do you really believe at the core? Not what you think others want to see, but the way you really are in private.